Bone Tomahawk is a stew of cliches that wastes the talent of its cast and makes no effort to compensate for its trite script.

When a group of cannibal savages kidnaps settlers from the small town of Bright Hope, an unlikely team of gunslingers, led by Sheriff Franklin Hunt, sets out to bring them home. But their enemy is more ruthless than anyone could have imagined, putting their mission – and survival itself – in serious jeopardy.

For some reason, this movie has an 87% score in RT and generally favorable reviews in Metacritic. Bone Tomahawk is a complete waste of time and talent.

Save for a few riding moments with nice tracking shots, this movie looked liked it was shot from a leftover studio set or somebody’s backyard. The generic set pieces do not provide any interesting visuals and a convincing setting for its story.

The talents of the cast is wasted on one dimensional stock characters. The main posse is composed of noble sheriff Franklin Hunt, the designated redeemable jerk John Brooder, the loyal somewhat comic-relief Chicory and the handicapped hero Arthur O’Dwyer. The actors are committed to do their job but they’re all thrown into a tedious and cliched plot.

The story has a slow build-up padded with unnecessary scenes, illogical moments to throw in narrative hurdles and implausible scenarios to showcase the travails of a crippled cowboy. In one scene, Arthur is able to find the lair of cannibals who kidnapped his wife after limping across the American southwest aided by a trail of four unremarkable rocks left by his companions.

The movie quickly establishes that these savages are a different faction of Native Americans who are rejected by their own kind to appease the PC police. Nonetheless, they are American Indians who are cannibals and employ the usual tricks of the trade – scalping and dismemberment. The movie only uses them as cannon fodder. The shoot ’em up action here is dull and dumb as their skills are useless against a crippled dude crawling on the ground armed with a revolver, inexhaustible stamina, and contrivances.

In the end, Bone Tomahawk finishes on its predictable course. It’s not clear what the director is gunning for in this movie. It’s not funny enough to be tongue-in-cheek. It’s heavy-handed to be a gritty and straightforward horror western. It takes itself too seriously to be a B-movie parody.

Bone Tomahawk is a straight-to-video last resort movie on a Netflix and chill night. You can “chill” while this movie plays in the background and you wouldn’t miss a thing.

My Rating: 1/10

Commentary:

I am completely aware that my rating is starkly negative. My criticism – or you know, an honest opinion – is based on what the movie presented. This review is not meant to be a contrarian just because professional critics have given it high-ratings. My rating is an overall score.

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